Can One Be a “Gay Christian”? Yes and No.

This comes up a lot in online and in-person conversations. Can one be gay and a Christian? 

Understand that I have no formal theological training. I am answering from the perspective of a layman. I read and study the Bible and I look to Christ for answers to questions I have. In response to anyone with the question about being a gay Christian, my answer is yes and no.

Yes, one can think of themselves as gay and still be a Christian. I know this because I myself am a sinner. I struggle against sin every moment of every day. 

Also, no, one cannot be a gay Christian. No more than one can be a lying, cheating, thieving, murdering, fill-in-the-sin Christian. Not if one is willfully, unrepentantly practicing the sin.

I am a Christian but I am still a sinner. I am a saved sinner who struggles against my sinful thoughts. I am not saved because I am perfect or sinless; I am saved because I have asked for forgiveness. I am saved because I am repentant. 

I am a Christian because I follow Christ and live for him. If I were sin-free, I would not need Christ and his forgiveness and mercy.

In looking for a way to better state how and why Christians are not - and can not be - sin-free,  I found that (as is usual) Got Questions explains it best for the layman.

Before I was saved and born again, there were times I didn't even realize some of my sins. I may have felt bad for my actions hurting others and I knew right from wrong. I just didn't think of my wrongs as sins. 

As a Christian, I am able to sin less - in some ways - but I can never be sin-free in this earth-bound body. Even when I don't put action to a sinful thought, the thought is there, no matter how fleeting. 

I have never struggled with my sexual identity and I imagine it can be a strong hold on a person. I have - and sometimes still do - struggle with envy, pride, anger, and forgiveness. Forgiveness! Me! The person who has been forgiven for so much.

So, to those who struggle with their sexual sins, I would say the same thing I say to myself: repent and turn over to God your heart, mind, body, and soul. Trust in him, lean on him. Pray, pray, pray. 

When we say the Lord's Prayer, we are asking that God not permit us to be tempted. (God Himself does not tempt us to sin.) I read somewhere (probably on Got Questions) this explained well. God doesn't allow us to sin and He has control over tempters. That makes a lot of sense to me.

Finally, I think that when we truly commit to following Christ, we know when we are doing something that displeases him. We may sometimes try to pretend we don't know. When I do wrong, I feel like hiding my face from God. Like Adam and Eve in the garden, when I fall into temptation, I want to cover myself. That's my sign, as one comedian jokes. 

I hope that this helps anyone who has these struggles. Read your Bible, study your Bible, and pray for understanding.

Peace

--Free

Daily Struggles

 I was thinking about how I sometimes seesaw between strength and weakness in my behavior. Some days, I find it easier to withstand temptation. Some days, I fold - elaborately and elegantly like a work of origami.

There are moments in my life when I find the wrong things so lovely and enchanting - not to my soul but to my flesh. Usually, these moments involve something or someone that I know is not having a positive influence on me but... it or they, are so... beautiful and intriguing. One day last week, I watched a movie with my neighbor who is a fan of the late Susan Sarandon. I'm not a Sarandon fan but I spent the rest of the week thinking about the absolutely startling gorgeousness of the male co-star. I would find myself randomly remembering his perfect mouth and the amazing color of his eyes. It was frightening to me that I could be so entranced by a total stranger.  On. A. Television. Screen. That's not healthy in any way.

Recently, I was thinking about my late best friend and a conversation we had six or seven years back. She was still one foot in and one foot out of "the world". She had come to realize that, while she now believed in what she called "a higher power", she had yet to decide what that power was. I reminded her that Evil is powerful. It's temporarily soothing. When you are undecided, Evil looks good, feels good, tastes good. When you are undecided, Evil - in your mind - is good. I advised her to make a decision and reminded her that we worship whatever we give power to.

Remembering that conversation often helps bring me back from my own wanderings. I think I gave my friend some good advice when I told her to read the Bible, pray, and meditate on what feels or seems good vs what truly is good. Give your heart and soul to what you worship. 

I try to focus on and take that same advice for myself. I often need to do just that.

It's when I start to get caught up in my emotions - "get all up in my feelings", is what my younger family members call this - I have to remember that what I feel isn't always a good thing. Of course, my feelings are real and a part of me, but feelings are fickle. Something can make me feel good while slowly killing me.

When I was a smoker, I loved smoking. I loved the way the nicotine made me feel. By the way, whenever I remember my days as a smoker,  I recall this scene from "Frasier":

When I was younger, sex was exquisite - whether it was with a spouse or not and whether or not it was happening for the best reasons or not. And here are scenes from the movie that left me wanting to commit every kind of immorality.

I, like a lot of people, forget that Satan (or what I prefer to call Evil) is the ruler of this world. We belong to God, but this age and this world do not. When Satan tried to tempt Jesus in the wilderness, the Lord did not dispute Satan's claim to the "kingdoms of the world", did he?

Then Jesus was led up by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil. 

And after He had fasted forty days and forty nights, He then became hungry. 

And the tempter came and said to Him, “If You are the Son of God, command that these stones become bread.” 

But He answered and said, “It is written, ‘Man shall not live on bread along, but on every world that proceeds out of the mouth of God.’ ”

Then the devil took Him into the holy city and had Him stand on the pinnacle of the temple, and *said to Him,

 “If You are the Son of God, throw Yourself down; for it is written, ‘He will command his angels concerning you’; and ‘On their hands they will bear you up, so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.’ ” 

Jesus said to him, “On the other hand, it is written, ‘You shall not put the Lord your God to the test.’ ” 

Again, the devil took Him to a very high mountain and showed Him all the kingdoms of the world and their glory; and he said to Him,

 “All these things I will give You, if You fall down and worship me.” 

Then Jesus said to him, “Go, Satan! For it is written, ‘You shall worship the Lord your God, And serve Him only.’ ” 

Then the devil left Him; and behold, angels came and began to minister to Him. (Matthew 4:1-11 NASB1995) (my bold)

For now, this is Evil's kingdom. Evil has reign and rules over most of what we see around us. We Christians live in this world and among its many lovely temptations: beautiful people who don't believe in the God we serve; music, art, and entertainment that does not glorify - and often despises -  Him; sex, drugs, and rock and roll. And it's sometimes so lovely and delicious.

Every day, I am Eve back and in the Garden, being tempted. Every day, I am trying not to make the mistake of accepting a taste of the sweetest of sin. Some days, I walk away, shaky and starved for what I remember feeling so wonderful. And some days, I am accepting a nibble, a bite, or I end up trying to gorge myself on a whole feast of whatever feels good at that moment.

My soul belongs to God but so often my feelings and my appetite belong to this present kingdom. I am just now reminded of the Guns and Roses album title, "Appetite for Destruction". 

The struggle truly is real. The struggle to stay focused on more than yesterday, today, or tomorrow. My struggle is to think of eternity. To live for eternity.

Peace

--Free